Coffee: a daily grind to get you through the daily grind. A caffeinated crusader to help in the fight against overdue PowerPoint Presentations.
However, if you’re the sort of sadist who thinks a basic cup o’ Joe is not enough of a morning fix, and wants a Bradley Cooper-in-Limitless sort of experience from their drink before a busy day in the office, then you’ll want to know about The Ass Kicker – and probably move to Australia forthwith.
Served by the ballsy baristas of Viscous Coffee in Christies Beach, Adelaide, this super brew consists of a quadruple shot of espresso, eight ice cubes made from 48-hour cold drip and 120ml of extra-aged ten-day cold brew, making it as strong as 80 regular cups of coffee.
Yes, 80, and it’s why you’ll also be totally unsurprised to learn that one cup equates to half a lethal dose of caffeine: an average cup contains 100 to 200 milligrams of caffeine; this one has five grams of the stuff.
Still, making Red Bull look like coconut water, imagine the office emails you could reply to with a few glugs of this bad boy, which comes priced at 12 Australian bucks.
Just be sure to limit it to one per day, mind. Anymore of this nectar and you’ll hit the floor like a sack of Colombian roasting beans.